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Seeking your soulmate this Valentine’s? The modern definition of soulmate usually infers a romantic relationship. If we expand the definition, however, to include anyone who influences your life one way or another, then potentially everyone in your life is your soul mate.


According to this more spiritual application, the people in our lives who interact with us on an emotional, mental, spiritual or physical level are here to help us work through certain issues. These relationships can bring out the best and the worst in an individual depending on the issues that need to be resolved. In this context, even the most difficult relationship can be a soulmate alliance.


Soulmate vs Life Partner


Life coach, Tanaaz Chubb, suggests we be clear about what type of relationship we are seeking and she distinguishes between ‘soulmate’ and ‘life partner’. Chubb asserts that if we are in search of a soulmate, what we are really seeking is to learn, grow and develop in consciousness. If we feel we have learnt our lessons and we are looking more for life-long companionship, this is the role of a life partner.


Chubb states that although there may not be as deep a soul connection with a life partner as there is with a soulmate, there is a mutual feeling of trust; understanding; respect, and of course love. Our life partner still has lessons to offer us but according to Chubb, this type of relationship is more about receiving support and gentle guidance as we navigate our soul journey.


Knowing what we want from a relationship and how we can grow and evolve within it allows us to be in the energetic frequency to receive it.


The following are a few characteristics, as outlined by Chubb, that differentiate soulmate and life partner relationships.


Soulmate Relationship


You feel a deep, spiritual connection to this person almost as though you have known them for a long time.


You seem to understand each other, and have a similar way of thinking.


Your connection is intense and so too is the relationship, often moving from extreme highs to extreme lows.


You know intuitively what the other is thinking or feeling.


Your relationship is emotional, challenging and can bring things out in you that you didn’t know existed.


Life Partner Relationship


You feel attracted to each other physically and resonate with each other’s values.


You get along like best friends, your relationship does not suffer from extremes.


Your relationship is based on logical or intellectual decisions.


Your relationship is based on being physically present and creating new memories.


You feel the need to marry or start a family in order to cement your relationship.


Whether you are seeking a romantic soulmate or a life partner, be open and receptive also to the opportunities to expand your consciousness through the interactions you have with everyone in your life.


Karen Gay, A-Roaming Bodyworker, is a holistic health practitioner practicing in Hanoi. For information on the types of services provided, visit

Karen Gay

A true global citizen, Karen has lived and travelled overseas for more than 20 years. Her current journey has led her down the rabbit hole. She's not sure she'll resurface. You can follow her on and